Buy a Damned T-Shirt!
Volume 2, Number 7 -- July, 1997

The BackPage

 In the finest backpage tradition, we are proud to present;

The Top 10 Questions on the Spice Girl Job Application
10) Do you have any detectable vestige of talent, besides your breasts?
9) Would it, like, bother you to be the target of unrelenting hatred?
8) "I am willing to trade sexual favors for a career in the music industry."
( )Yes ( )No
7) Does nudity bother you? If so, should I put my clothes back on?
6) Explain the difficulties in identifying the source of individual free will in light of the deterministic theories of neurochemical medicine and modern behavioralist psychology. Just kidding!! Seriously, do you like leather mini-skirts?
5) Are you deceptively attractive in colored or stroboscopic light?
4) Choose an appropriate nickname: i.e., Sexy, Nasty, Sweetie, Chlamydia...
3) Have you ever been convicted of combining vertical and horizontal stripes?
2) If two trains leave Liverpool an hour apart at 90 kilometers, and 75 kilometers an hour, respectively, how would you look in spandex?
1) Does the term "force majeure in perpetuity" make you afraid or just giggly?
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