Last Modified: Oct 1, 1995

Why Beer is Better than Women

Ok, so this is about as politically correct as G. Gordon Liddy - It's still funny. Check out Why a Cucumber is Better Than a Man for the opposing viewpoint...

  1. You can enjoy a beer all month long
  2. Beer stains wash out
  3. You don't have to wine and dine a beer
  4. Your beer will always wait patiently for you in the car while you play football
  5. When your beer goes flat, you toss it out
  6. Beer never changes its mind
  7. A beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer
  8. Beer is never late
  9. Hangovers go away
  10. Beer labels come off without a fight
  11. Beer never has a headache
  12. When you go to a bar, you know you can always pick up a beer
  13. After you've had a beer, the bottle is still worth 10 cents
  14. A beer won't get upset if you come home and have another beer
  15. If you pour a beer right, you always get good head
  16. You can have more than one beer a night and not feel guilty
  17. A beer always goes down easy
  18. You can share a beer with your friends
  19. You always know when you are the first one to pop a beer
  20. Beer is always wet
  21. Beer doesn't demand quality
  22. You can have a beer in public
  23. A beer doesn't care when you come
  24. A frigid beer is a good beer
  25. You don't have to wash a beer before it tastes good
  26. If you change beers, you don't have to pay alimony

Hey! If you liked this, visit the
The SCROOMtimes
lots of new stuff we know you'll love!

Comments? Questions? Thoughts on the meaning of life? Let me know!

copyright © 1995 Andrew Wallace